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趣味英语:班级、情人和蠢驴

[03-16 15:35:02]   来源:http://www.99youjiao.com  趣味英语   阅读:8693

概要:"May God strike me dead if I am lying.""Then I pray to God that you are lying", his wife said hopefully.一个发怒妻子的祈祷一个男人因嗜赌而经常回家很晚,为此他妻子从没停止过骂他。一次他因工作很晚回到家后,他妻子指责他又去赌博了,可他发誓说这次是因为工作。"我祈祷上帝你说的是实话,"妻子说。"如果我说谎上帝便赐我于死。""那我祈祷上帝你是在说谎。"他妻子充满希望地说。SHE'D RATHER BUY A GIFTWhile on a trip, Mom realized that she had forgotten a present for Dad's birthday. "That's okay," he said, "The only thing I want is for you to love, hono

趣味英语:班级、情人和蠢驴,标签:小学趣味英语,儿童趣味英语,http://www.99youjiao.com
"May God strike me dead if I am lying."
"Then I pray to God that you are lying", his wife said hopefully.
一个发怒妻子的祈祷
一个男人因嗜赌而经常回家很晚,为此他妻子从没停止过骂他。一次他因工作很晚回到家后,他妻子指责他又去赌博了,可他发誓说这次是因为工作。"我祈祷上帝你说的是实话,"妻子说。
"如果我说谎上帝便赐我于死。"
"那我祈祷上帝你是在说谎。"他妻子充满希望地说。

SHE'D RATHER BUY A GIFT
While on a trip, Mom realized that she had forgotten a present for Dad's birthday. "That's okay," he said, "The only thing I want is for you to love, honor and obey." Mom pondered that idea and then replied "I'd rather buy you a gift."
她宁愿买一件礼物
旅途中,妈妈想起她忘记给爸爸买一件生日礼物。"没关系,"他说,"我最想要的东西是你的爱、忠贞和温顺。"妈妈沉思片刻后回答说,"我宁愿给你买一件礼物。"

Friend for Dinner
"Honey," said the husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."
"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"
"I know all that."
"Then why did you invite a friend for supper?"
"Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
请朋友吃饭
  “亲爱的,”丈夫对妻子说:“我邀请了一位朋友回家吃晚饭。”
  “什么?你疯了吗?我们的房子乱糟糟的,我很久没有买过东西回来了,所有的碗碟都是脏的,还有,我可不想做一餐累死人的晚饭。”
  “这些我全都知道。”
  “那你为什么还要邀请朋友回来吃晚饭?”
  “因为那个可怜的笨蛋正考虑要结婚呢。”

Whose Son Is the Greatest
The mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "My son is a monsignor," said the first proud woman. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Monsignor.'"
The second mother went on, "My son is a bishop. When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Excellency.'"
"My son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Eminence.'"
The fourth mother thought for a moment. "My son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300 pounds," she said, "When he enters a room, people say, 'Oh, my God.'"
谁的儿子最伟大
  四个神职人员的母亲聚在一起谈论自己的儿子。“我儿子是个牧师,”第一个骄傲的母亲说,“当他走进一个房间时,人们会说,‘您好,牧师。”
  第二个母亲接着说,“我儿子是个主教,当他走进一个房间时,人们会说,‘您好,主教阁下。”
  “我儿子是红衣主教,”第三个母亲继续,“当他走进一个房间时,人们会说,‘您好,尊敬的红衣主教。”
  第四个母亲想了一会儿,说:“我儿子身高6尺10吋,体重300磅,当他走进一个房间时,人们都说,‘哦,我的上帝!” www.99youjiao.com

The Lost Purse
A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her.
Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills."
The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."
丢失的钱包
  一位女士圣诞节大购物,在匆忙中丢失了钱包。有一个诚实的小男孩找到了钱包并还给她。
  女士看着钱包,说:“嗯,真有趣。我丢失钱包的时候,里面有一张20元的钞票,但现在变成了20张1元的零钞。”
  小孩马上回答道:“没错,小姐。上次我找到了一位女士的钱包,但是她没有零钱作酬金。”

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